The grumpy poet Philip Larkin famously wrote about families: ‘They f*** you up, your mum and dad / They may not mean to, but they do.’ That was in 1971.爱发牢骚的诗人飞利浦.拉金在1971年写过一句著名的诗句：你的父母把你培养成了如此糟糕的人，也许他们本不想这样，但是木已成舟。Now, nearly half a century on, the very latest science is proving he was right — but not in the way he meant.半个世纪快过去了，最新的科学证明了他是对的，不过他的表达有点问题。Larkin’s bitter-tinged, blame-laying verse was picking up on the popular notion, going back to Sigmund Freud, that it is the things that happen to us, such as our relationships with our parents as we grow up, that make us who we are.拉金尖酸刻薄、责怪父母的这一诗句提到了西格蒙德·弗洛伊德时期的流行概念：我们周遭发生的一切，如我们成年以前和父母形成的关系，造就了我们今日的个性。Environment is everything; nurture (or lack of it) is the key. But not any more.环境至上，教养最为关键的这一概念现已被逆转。Now, one of the country’s top psychologists and behavioural geneticists, Professor Robert Plomin, of King’s College London, offers an emphatic conclusion.现在，英国伦敦国王学院的顶尖心理学家和行为遗传学家罗伯特.普洛明教授将就该问题给出有力的结论。It is drawn from 45 years of research and hundreds of studies. He says the single most important factor in each and every one of us — the very essence of our individuality — is our genetic make-up, our DNA.该结论来源于45年的调查和数百次的研究。他表示每个人最重要的组成部分--个性的本质--是我们的基因组成，也就是我们的脱氧核糖核酸(DNA)。The basic building blocks of life that we inherit from our parents are what determine who we are — not how much they loved us, read us books or which school they sent us to.是我们从父母那遗传的DNA是我们生活的基石，决定了我们的个性，而不是父母对我们的喜爱之情，为我们读了多少的书或他们送我们读的学校起了决定性的作用。DNA accounts for at least half the variance in people’s psychological traits, much more than any other single factor. Put simply, ‘nature’ trumps ‘nurture’ every time, and not just marginally, but by a long, long chalk.DNA占了人们心理特质中的至少半数的方差，比任何其他个别因素更重要。简单地来说，在天性和教养的角逐中，每每胜出的都是天性，而且每次都不是小胜，是大胜。Our DNA, fixed and unchangeable, determines whether we have a predisposition not just to physical traits — from how tall we are to how much we weigh — but also to our intelligence and our psychology, from a tendency to depression to having resilience and grit.我们的DNA是固定和不变的，它决定我们的身高体重方面的身体特征，还有我们的智力和心理状态，以及抗压、适应和坚毅程度方面的素质。Plomin’s revolutionary conclusion — outlined in a challenging and thought-provoking new book, Blueprint: How DNA Makes Us Who We Are — is a game-changer, he claims, with far-reaching implications for psychology and for society.在具有挑战力和发人深省的新书《蓝图：DNA如何影响我们》中，普洛明教授概述了这一突破性的结论。他说，这本书对心理学和社会都有非常深远的影响，具有力挽狂澜的能力。He turns much conventional thinking on its head, controversially calling into question many basic assumptions, such as the value of formal education to change people’s lives.他扭转了很多的传统思想，做出了很多具有争议性的基本假设，如正规教育能否扭转人们的生活等价值观。It also undermines the parenting advice industry, the basis of all those groaning shelves of manuals telling us the right way to bring up our children and the disasters that will ensue if we get it wrong.育儿资讯行业是告诉我们该如何正确培养孩子以及预防灾难性的后果的大量资料的提供者，而作者在这本书否定了这一行业。These sell because every parent wants to think they can make a difference to their child, that they can help him or her with reading and arithmetic or teach them how to be kind or conscientious. But, says Plomin, there’s no hard evidence that this is true.这个行业之所以会如此受欢迎是因为每个家长会通过教孩子阅读和算术，或教他们如何善待他人、尽职尽责，以给孩子积极的影响。但是，普洛明教授表示，没有具体的证据能证明这是有用的。On the contrary, our ability to read, to learn, to empathise and so on are all ruled primarily by our genes.相反，我们的阅读、学习、同情等能力主要是由基因决定的。Being a tiger mum (or dad) and laying down a strict regime of learning won’t be of the slightest use unless those tendencies already exist in the child’s DNA.除非孩子的DNA中存在着这些倾向， 否则虎妈狼爸的教育方式，以及为孩子学习定下的严格的学习计划压根起不到任何作用。The raw material of our natural selves is what overwhelmingly determines what we can — and cannot — achieve, not how we are brought up. And all those parenting books that promise to deliver developmental outcomes for children are, he maintains, merely ‘peddling snake oil’.从很大程度上来说，我们的先天所具备的条件，而不是后天的条件，决定了我们能还是不能成就某些事情。他坚称所有的承诺能给孩子带来阶段性发展结果的育儿书籍都只不过是非法售卖的蛇油。If Plomin is right — and he offers an impressive array of research over many years — then dear old Philip Larkin was a grumpy old man not because of his upbringing, but because that tendency was in the genetic blueprint he was born with. The good news, of course, is that his huge talent came from the same source.在普洛明教授多年来提供了一系列令人印象深刻的调查，如果他是对的，那敬爱的菲利普·拉金爱抱怨的天性就是受了自身的基因蓝图的影响，和教育的完全没有关系。好消息是，他的天赋也是来自同一个地方。Chicago-born Plomin’s startling conclusions come from two of his long-term studies. Over the course of 40 years, he tracked 250 adopted children in Colorado along with the birth parents who gave them their genes, and the adoptive parents who raised them. After moving to London in 1994, he launched a 20-year study of more than 12,000 pairs of twins.芝加哥的普洛明教授的惊人结论出自于他的两项长期研究。在过去的40年中，他跟踪了科罗拉多250个被领养的孩子、 他们的亲生父母，和他们的养父母。在1994年搬到伦敦后，他发起了一项针对12000多对双胞胎的长达20年研究。From these studies, it was possible to unravel the relative importance of genes as opposed to environment when it came to their development.这些研究可以阐明发展中基因及其相反面的环境的相对重要性。Millions of pieces of data were amassed from the parents, teachers and the children themselves, about psychological traits such as hyperactivity and inattention, talents such as school achievement and the ability to learn languages, and physical characteristics, such as the propensity to put on weight and become obese.他收集了父母、老是和孩子本人数百万条数据，如多动和粗心等心理特征方面的数据，学业成绩和语言学习能力方面的天赋数据，以及体重增加和肥胖方面的倾向数据。From all this, he found overwhelming evidence that adopted children are similar to their birth parents, not the parents who raised them. Identical twins (ie, from a single egg and therefore with the same DNA) develop much more similarly to each other as compared with non-identical twins (from separate eggs and with different DNA).在这些数据中，他发现了大量被领养孩子和亲生父母，而并非和养父母有些相似之处的证据。拥有相同DNA的同卵双胞胎比DNA不同的同卵双胞胎的相似性更大。The conclusion was clear — DNA makes us who we are. In the long term, the environment you grow up in has little impact on the way you turn out.这个结论非常明确，DNA成就了我们。从长期来看，我们成长的环境对我们的现在并没有影响。Even stressful life events such as relationship break-ups, financial difficulties and illness don’t have the impact that people generally assume.甚至分手、财政困难和疾病等充满压力的生活事件对人们的影响远远没有通常想象的那么大。In fact, what really matters in such situations is our genes, because it is our genes that determine how well or badly an individual deals with such setbacks. And whether we’re resilient to life’s catastrophes or cave in is determined by our DNA, too.实际上，在这里真正起到重要作用的是我们的基因，因为是我们的基因决定了每个人挫折承受力的高低。我们是否能够适应或与生活中的灾难也是是由取决于我们的DNA。Take divorce. Even though the children in a family are all affected, how each individual deals with it often differs. It is often harder on one sibling than the other(s) — and that difference is because of their different DNA.以离婚为例，虽然家中的孩子会受到影响，但每个孩子接受方式各不相同。其中的一个孩子会比另一个孩子更难适应，这个区别来自于他们不同的DNA。In fact, Plomin argues, there are genetic influences in virtually everything we do. Those differences determine how we perceive and interpret the world we grow up in, and how we modify our behaviour accordingly.实际上，普洛明教授认为，我们所做的所有事情中都有基因的影子。这些区别决定了我们看待和解读我们成长环境的方式，以及我们如何做出相应改变的方式。In school, genetic differences in children’s aptitudes and interests, inherited from their parents, affect the extent to which they take advantage of educational opportunities. Similarly, genetic differences in our vulnerability to depression affect the extent to which we interpret experiences we undergo positively or negatively.在学校，孩子遗传自父母的天赋和兴趣的遗传差异影响了他们利用教育机会的程度。同样，我们罹患抑郁症的遗传差异影响了我们用积极或消极的方式解读自身经历的程度。The blueprint of our DNA even affects seemingly unrelated events such as road accidents. Car crashes are often caused by reckless driving, driving too fast, taking chances, or driving under the influence of alcohol and other drugs. Genetic differences in personality can increase the likelihood of accidents happening.DNA蓝图甚至还对交通事故等看上去毫不相关的事件有着影响。车祸通常是因为司机鲁莽驾驶、开快车、投机取巧，或酒驾和吸毒驾驶所导致。个性的遗传差异可以增加事故发生的可能性。As his research developed over the years, Plomin was taken by surprise by the all-pervasiveness of genetic influences he discovered in almost every aspect of human behaviour — even down to being a nice person or not.在普洛明教授展开调查的这几年中，他被遗传差异的普遍性吓了一跳。他发现在人类行为的各个方面都有存在遗传差异，甚至在随和度方面也存在着遗传差异。Altruism, caring and kindness are components of what personality researchers call ‘agreeableness’, and for years it seemed logical to him that these traits had to be the result of the environment we live in and the influence of those around us.利他主义和善良都是研究人员称之为“随和”的个性的组成部分，多年来，他认为外部环境和他人影响看上去才是影响这些特征的原因。But his research showed this was not the case. Being nice is also something in our DNA. The same goes for grit and determination. Nurture and example do not teach some children to be tougher than others, their genes do.但是他的研究显示，事实并非如此。对人友好也是我们DNA中的一部分。勇气和决心也是如此。教养和典范并不会教会孩子变得更坚强，是他们的基因在起着这样的作用。All this leads Plomin to a conclusion that is hard to take: the family, he tells us, far from being the monolithic determinant of who we are, the bedrock from which we learn and grow, actually makes little difference to our personalities and the way we turn out.所有的这一切让普洛明教授得到一个难以得出的结论：他告诉我们，家庭不是影响我们的唯一决定因素，我们学习和成长的基础实际上对我们的性格和我们的将来没有任何影响。There are exceptions.以下是一些例外情况。Abuse, for example, can make huge differences to individuals, but because these instances are comparatively rare they do not alter the general finding that overall it is DNA that rules the roost.例如，虐待对每个人的影响巨大，但是因为这种现象相当罕见，它们并撼动不了DNA的决定整体情况的结论。This, too, explains why siblings are often so different in personality and temperament from each other even though they grow up side by side — something that often has parents shaking their heads in frustration. ‘Why can’t you be hard-working like your sister?!’这也解释了为什么在同一屋檐下长大的孩子的性格和气质如此不同的原因，父母们经常会因此而沮丧地摇头。“为什么你不像你的姐姐学习那么努力？!”For example, Boris Johnson, is chaotic and boisterous, a flamboyant extrovert — the opposite of his rather more restrained and quiet little brother, government minister Jo Johnson, though they were brought up in the same household went to the same school and the same college at the same university. This indicates that nature, not nurture, makes the difference例如，鲍里斯·约翰逊有非常混乱和活跃、锋芒外露的特征，这和他作为政府部长的哥哥拘谨和安静的特征形成了反差，虽然他们是在同一个家庭长大，读的是同样的小学、中学和大学。这个例子指出，先天而不是后天是才起着关键的作用。So what, then, is the role of parents if they can’t make much of a difference in their children’s development beyond the genes they provide at conception?如果父母们的在孩子的发展过程中不能起到很大作用，那么他们的到底对孩子有什么影响呢？未完待续source：https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6170137/Is-thought-knew-parenting-wrong-Geneticist-reveals-secret.html}

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展开全部 “ 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞 ”这个俗语说的是遗传的重要性。遗传对孩子的身高，外貌，肤色等都会产生很大的影响。 然而，现在有些家长，为了推卸责任，孩子学习成绩不好，也归结于遗传，说家里没有”学霸“的基因；孩子脾气暴躁，家长就互相责怪，说遗传了对方的性格。”遗传“真的会影响孩子的性格吗？ 01 曾经有一对三胞胎，在婴儿时期被当成试验品分别送到了不同阶层的家庭分开抚养。他们彼此都不知道自己同胞的存在。 在不同的家庭环境生活的三胞胎，外貌，动作，习惯有很多相似，但在十几年后性格却发生了非常大的差异。 鲍勃的养父母家境殷实，属于上等阶层。长大后的鲍勃性格坚定，积极进取，事业也取得了成功。 艾迪的养父母都受过高等教育，是典型的中产阶级，家教也非常严格，但他与父母的关系却很糟糕；后来艾迪因为试验被曝光，承受着巨大的精神压力而选择自我解脱。 大卫生活在移民家庭，家境一般，没有受过太多教育，但家人生活温暖，性格乐观。拥有幸福童年的大卫岁虽然生活平淡但也过得很不错。 可见，遗传能影响人的长相，行为习惯，但却没办法决定孩子后天性格的养成。 02 生活中，人们也越来越认识到家庭环境对孩子的重要性。 温暖的家庭氛围，父母的关爱能让孩子得到安全感，学会信赖。
生活中有很多父母为了孩子能够赢在起跑线上，斥巨资给孩子购买学区房，孩子从小就在线上线下学习各种辅导班，更有甚者，为了孩子能专心学习，一切都可以替孩子代劳；殊不知孩子其实更需要的是心灵上的慰藉，需要父母的理解和关爱。这些看似幸福的孩子却长成了“巨婴”。 也有很多贫困家庭出身的孩子，由于从小受到正确的家庭教育和父母的关爱，通过自己的努力，获得了成功。 父母的阶层可能决定了孩子出生后的生活环境，但家庭的关怀却能温暖孩子一生。 03 经常会有很多专家会发表说：“ 寒门难出贵子 ”！他们也会剖析其中的原因，其中很大一个原因就是：“父母和孩子很像”。不仅孩子的外貌会遗传父母，同样，孩子的性格，思维方式，解决问题的习惯，也会在日复一日耳濡目染下和父母越来越像。即使站在父母的肩膀上，他们又能比父母看得远多少呢？
没有好的物质条件，就给孩子创造一个好的家庭环境吧！因为宽松和谐的家庭氛围对孩子的成长意义更加重大。
孩子是父母的一面镜子，孩子的外貌来自父母的遗传，孩子的性格也受到父母的影响孩子。生活在专制，吵闹的家庭环境中的孩子往往是自卑，冷漠，暴力，无情的；只有在快乐宽松的氛围中长大的孩子才更懂得友爱的价值。
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